Arts: Sixth graders hold concert, proud father blogs about it, posts picture. Daughter becomes angry, threatens violence. This is a developing story...
US Senate: 6 term Senator from Indiana Dick Lugar lost his primary election yesterday. The Senator was first sworn in when Gerald Ford was still President. The octogenarian seemed confused by the turn of events and had to be reminded several times during his concession speech to close his robe.
WI Recall: Union leaders declared victory on Tuesday as their chosen candidate received fewer votes than her challenger and both candidates combined received fewer votes that Scott Walker. "It was our plan all along to go into the general election after suffering massive loses, everyone always supports the underdog. We have Walker right were we want him. Off in the distance and moving fast." Political pundits question the wisdom of the strategy, suggesting instead that "winning" is the best way to gain political office.
Entertainment: Barack Obama and the team behind "Julia" have been nominated for the American Comedy Awards "Best New Comic" prize for the hilarious portrayal of a person who is completely unable to survive without government help. The inept "Julia" bumbles through one misadventure in life after another all the time hoping for a little "deus ex machina" to see her through. Enjoy "Julia" while you can, as a second season seems unlikely.
Presidential Race: Mitt Romney in an attempt to show his comic chops as well did a 2 minute stand up routine on the "Julia" Character. While thought provoking the act caused some members of the audience to doze off. Romney stated later that "He would never let Carrot Top open for him again"
Disturbing: Orlando FL home to Disney and Sea World is the US city in which more porn is watched than any other. Snow White and Shamu could not be reached for comment. Goofy was caught by photographers exiting a 24 hour "bookstore". He stated that he was "just reading the articles".
Business: Yahoo CEO says he is sorry for lying to everybody for the last 33 years and states that "Hey, a degree in accounting from the 'Harlem School for Accounting and Auto Maintainence' is almost EXACTLY the same as a degree in Computer Engineering from 'MIT'. I don't see what the problem is. It was just a minor typo. Also, No one ever reads a resume. I mean seriously, after 33 years this is the first time anyone has read the whole thing. Did you see the bit that says I was an Apollo 13 Astronaut? What about the stuff on page 2? Some of my best stuff is page 2. Start with the bit about defeating Mordor and go on from there."
FNN - Breaking News like Chuck Norris Breaks Bricks
Personally, I think that Obama should follow the lead of the WI union leaders. Seems like a good strategy for him.
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